I Won't Share My Oreos

As you get older, birthdays get...complicated. It used to be so easy. Cake and candles, invite your friends over, a pile of presents, rinse, repeat. But now that I'm older, it's more of an annoying obligation that anything else at times. It feels as if I'm expected to have a party, expected to go out, when often all I want to do is stay home with a pizza.

This year is the first of those big, round number they put on greeting cards: 25 years old. I'm in a new age bracket on forms, no longer relegated to the 18-24s. In honor of making it halfway to when I can start being an eccentric aunt, I decided to celebrate this birthday in my own way. Instead of doing all the things I felt expected to do, I promised myself that I would only do what I wanted. 

My actual birthday was Monday, but I figured, why not take the whole weekend. Treat yo self, right? Saturday was amazing, though from the outside, very boring. I managed to roll out of bed around 11. After a couple weeks sleeping in a nest of blankets, a chance to really enjoy my new bed was really the only birthday present I wanted. My bedroom faces south, so the sun really lights it up during the day. 

The rest of the day was basically just...hardcore puttering? Is that a thing? If it isn't, it should be, because I puttered in a big way. I've been so busy that it feels like I live at school rather than in my apartment. As it turns out, moving to a bigger apartment means a great deal of work. To put it in perspective, my current bedroom is about the size of my old apartment, and my bedroom isn't exactly a cathedral. I'm pretty sure my new place is about 2-3 times the size of my old place, so even after a couple weeks, I'm still working on getting everything in order. Step by step.

I tried to bring the landlord's dog, Sunjin, with me on a walk, but I think he's still a bit too young and skittish to go off on an adventure with a non-family person. Honestly it was adorable. As I was leaving, his main owner said we should go together, and I was totally board, and so was Sunjin-- at first. We made it about 3 blocks before he abruptly decided that nope, nope, this was was not happening. I tried to reassure him but he was having none of it. Hopefully once he gets to know me better I can start taking him on my walks down by the river. I miss having dogs.

On Sunday I was ambushed. I was hanging out with some friends, with no particular plans. As I came back into the room after using the restroom, I could tell something fishy was going on. I was made to sit in a particular place. Everyone was acting a bit dodgy. By the time I realized the truth, it was too late: the cake was already entering the room, a lovely green tea cake with fruit on top from Tous Les Jours, so I honestly can't complain.

Monday should have been horrible. I had the worst schedule in the history of school schedules: 6 out of 7 class periods, mostly 3rd grade, plus debate club during lunch. Normally I only teach 4-5 classes, so 6 plus debate was just...horrible to imagine. However, thanks to some kind of ~birthday magic~ all of my classes went smoothly, or at least didn't make me want to hide under my desk and cry,

About once a month the old office crew, basically my work family, meets up for a meal and coffee. It's a great time to actually talk and catch up, since we're all in different schools and offices now. This time it lined up perfectly with my birthday, so they took me out for shabu shabu. It was so delicious, but I ate waaaay too much. Mushrooms, noodles, vegetables, meat, more mushrooms, wrap it up in some rice paper, dip it in sauce, enjoy, repeat until uncomfortably full.

There was too much food to fit into the shot.

However, apparently just eating way too much food was not enough, because we braved the rain to visit a bakery that I think belongs to my supervisor's...sister in law? Something like that. Anyways, the place renovated recently and started baking things. Really delicious and pretty things. Things that include super adorable cakes with fruit on top AND inside. Magical! It was also apparently the first cake ever made in the new place! I felt so honored!

So many delicious breads!

Too cute to eat.

Clever decorations.

Birthdays may be getting more difficult as time goes by, but this has been the best birthday I've had in a long time. What stands out the most is how...thoughtful people have been. Two of my students gave me oreos because they remembered an off-hand comment I'd made about loving them. They also told me I wasn't allowed to share them with anyone- these oreos are mine and mine alone, which was such a cute sentiment. Other new friends remembered that I'd chosen the green tea ice cream one time, so they chose a green tea cake. Elly gave me a lamp because she knows I read in bed. Hyeonji gave me candles to cheer up my new home.

I'm terrible at asking for what I want or need, but this time it worked out even without my help. If this birthday is an omen for this year, I've got a great time to look forward to.

 As a bonus, here's a video that Hyeonji took on the sly. We all thought she was just taking pictures! The sneaky monkey.

Weekly Quote Collection: Shaking my Sausage

My students are constantly saying either hilarious or amazing things, so I'm going to start posting highlights here on a weekly basis. This week was...quite the week.

During a 1st year class:

"Teacher! I'm shaking my sausage every day!"

"Me too teacher! I'm very long sausage!"

Someone had taught them the term "johnson" as well, so there were plenty such jokes as well. Another boy came up to me to ask "Teacher, what is 'Johnson'?" I managed to choke out, while trying to hide my laughter "It's...a boy has..."

"Ah, okay okay. Thank you teacher."

I accidentally wore burgundy tights and a red coat and an orangey scarf today, so the comments about my color choices were common. The best, though, happened during my last class of the day today.

First, I was compared to Christmas. Then a tree with autumn leaves. Once I was compared to Iron Man, I knew I had to get things under control. Off came the coat, but my problems weren't over. My dress today has pretty structured shoulders, so the moment my coat came off I heard the words.

"Oh! Teacher! Vegeta! Dragon ball!"

I just can't win.

Bonus points if you photoshop my face onto a picture of Vegeta.

One Year Later

The traditional gift for a first anniversary is paper, so I guess after I write this I'll print a copy and frame it. What I'm trying to say is, a little over one year ago, I arrived in Korea. The modern first anniversary gift is a clock, which seems apt as the time has passed faster than I realized. A year already? Are you sure?

I've been looking back through old posts, and it's a relief to see that my feelings about the country haven't changed that much:

"This is where I’ll be living for the next year, maybe more, and there is nothing I want more in life right now. I’ve never been the sort to follow my dreams; I’ve stuck to what I know I can accomplish, and that’s been fine, but finally I’m taking a chance at something I’ve wanted since I met those Jet teachers in Japan almost six years ago." 

I know, I know, it's disgustingly...shmoopy and emotional, but the sentiment was, and is, 100% real. I needed a change, a new life, a new chance. While I'm not quite ready to go public with everything that was going wrong in my life before I moved to Korea, suffice it to say that things were...bad. Not good. Things felt pretty hopeless, like my life was on hold. It doesn't help that the weather in Seattle shares most of its characteristics with a damp sock. Even when things are going well in your life, unless you really enjoy overcast gray weather, it's hard to stay positive during the interminably long Seattle winters. And springs. And falls. And sometimes it stays cloudy even though summer, because the other 9 months just weren't enough!

During the 12 hour flight from Seattle to Korea, I made a decision to use this move as a chance to really change my life. Instead of bringing all my bad habits and worries along in my carry on, I wanted to do my best to leave them all back in Seattle. New country, new me.

At my Epik orientation, I had a great chance to really focus in on what I wanted to change in my life. One of the activities during the week was an introductory taekwondo class. They had us write our goals for the coming year on a board and then break it. To me, it felt as if I was putting all my fears, my worries, my problems into that board, and in the act of breaking it, I was sending them out of my life. As you can see in the photo, I had three main goals. "Don't be afraid. Learn Korean. Be happy." It's one year later. How did I do?

1. Don't Be Afraid

This is a big one. It seems a bit silly, but trust me, it really is an important issue in my life. I'm anxious a lot of the time, and a bit shy, and nervous in unfamiliar situations. I've missed out on opportunities because I was too worried about dumb stuff to take advantage of them. I didn't want that to happen here. Moving to a new country, starting a new job, meeting so many new people...it's been one unfamiliar situation after another.

What this first goal means to me is just...don't miss out. Don't stay home because you're worried you won't know anyone at the party. Don't keep your mouth shut because you're not sure what to say. Don't overthink it. As those Nike shirts say, just do it.

While I don't feel that I've completely accomplished this goal, I know I've made progress. I volunteered as class leader during my orientation and managed to make a speech in front of the entire orientation without fainting. I took a vacation entirely by myself, from Sokcho to Seoul. I've befriended people in my office even through a severe language barrier. Instead of saying no and staying on the sidelines, I'm saying yes and making a fool of myself but having fun.

2. Learn Korean

This has been a bit on again off again. When I first started studying Korean seriously, it was fantastic, because I was learning at a breakneck speed. I've written about this before, how the first few months were so exciting, because every grammar point opened vast expanses of understanding. However, as with anything, the honeymoon had to end. Now that I actually have to work pretty hard to learn new things, it's easier to get frustrated. I often feel like I'm not improving at all. My vocabulary is tiny, my grammar sucks, and no matter how much or little I study, nothing seems to change.

However, while I don't really feel as if I've improved, when I take a step back, I realize that that's crazy talk. A friend recently reminded me that when I left for Korea, I knew about two phrases, plus I could read and write very, very slowly. I think back to those first few work dinners, how I sat in a corner, unable to understand most of what was going on around me. And actually talking to someone? No way.

Inexplicably, I left a note to my family in Korean. SECRET MESSAGES.

Now I can have conversations, albeit very simple ones. I can ask for directions and halfway understand what I'm told. I can befriend taxi drivers, make jokes in the office, and be the occasional living dictionary for my students. While I'm certainly not anywhere near fluent, I have improved. I hope this coming year will be my chance to improve even further.

3. Be Happy

I guess this one is obvious, huh? Deceptively simple, in a way. But of all my goals, this is the one that I feel I've been most successful at. Not to say I've become Pollyanna-ish; I certainly have my share of bad days, but since I moved to Korea they're at least fewer and farther between. When I start to get down, I'm able to get back up a lot faster. Maybe it's the weather.

Oddly enough, I feel at home here. I'm not at all sure why, but Korea just really seems to suit me. Time and time again people tease me about my "Korean heart" or say that even if I look like an American, I'm secretly Korean. Frankly I think they're exaggerating, but it warms my heart every time. 

A big part of this as well is the feeling of having purpose. Instead of a repetitive job that never seems to affect anything, I have a job where I actually feel like I'm improving and changing lives, at least in small ways. Instead of a job, I have what feels like the beginning of a career. For every rough class there is an amazing class. Seeing that "aha!" moment when I student learns something new or gets inspired because of something in my class...that is what makes me happy. 

How could that face NOT make you happy?

All in all, it's been a good year. I finally feel like I have my feet under me. I've got my sealegs. Things are coming together, and I'm not even 25 yet! For the folks keeping score, looks like I managed a 3/3. Granted, my goals were simple and open-ended, but where I'm looking from, I call it a victory. Does this mean it's time to make a new set of goals?

Guess I'd better find a board and a permanent marker~!

Get a Move On: A Tour of My New Apartment in Korea

As you may have gathered from my previous post, my dreams of living in a space bigger than a shoebox are finally coming true! By which I mean, of course, I moved!

Unfortunately I never really got any good pictures of my old place, but it was quite small. Bigger than a dorm room, but not by much. My "kitchen" was a microwave with a hotplate perched on top, and if I had dishes to dry I didn't have even an inch of counter space. No table, no chair, no couch, just a bed and a TV and a dresser. I'm not complaining, though; for the first place I've ever lived in without a roommate, it was quite nice. Certainly cozy in the winter!

However, when it came time to renew the lease, I felt the need for something...more. Like a stove. And the ability to invite more than one person over without running out of space. My new place feels ridiculously huge in comparison. I'm pretty sure my new bedroom is bigger than my old apartment in it's entirety, and the concept of having multiple rooms is really confusing me at this point. I keep losing track of my stuff because I leave it in a different room.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's do a tour!

I'm teaching him English.

My place is above a 삼겹살 (Korean BBQ) restaurant, so I have to enter through a sort of back courtyard that is "guarded" by the cutest little black lab puppy. He's a bit shy, but I'm sure we'll become friends before too long. The courtyard is actually part of the prep area of the kitchen, meaning that in the evening I sometimes have to pick my way around cabbage scraps from kimchi making or confuse restaurant patrons who were just looking for the bathroom. "Why is there a white girl in gym clothes in the back room of my restaurant?" I imagine them thinking.

My landlords are forever interested in my life as well. In a way it feels like living with family. If I come home late, they want to know where I was, and make sure I ate dinner. If I go out, they want to know why I'm getting coffee but not dinner. I once came home with a big shopping bag and the grandpa was super curious about what I'd bought. "Did you buy something pretty?"

I know this might sound a bit annoying, but it's actually oddly comforting. It's nice to know there's someone looking out for me. Also, I turn it into a game of stealth. Can I get past the dog without making him bark, then across the courtyard and into the safety of my apartment before anyone notices me? It's fun~

Even my door is exciting.

Once I make it up the stairs I get to enjoy all the benefit of a potted garden with none of the responsibility of watering and transplanting. I also really enjoy this fancy door. It's little details like this that make even an apartment feel fancy.

Please, come in.

Entrance...pretty normal. The shoe cabinet is what matters, though. I can fit all of my shoes in there, with a whole shelf empty to fill with NEW shoes. Total enabler. There's also a pretty sweet section for stuff like umbrellas and gloves and hats. I might install a coat hanger system of some sort, but I'm not entirely sure about the logistics of that just yet. I figure hot water and a bed should come before things like coat hangers.

Please ignore the mess.

A view from the entrance, with suitcases for scale. Look at all the natural light! The bedroom has southern exposure and a big window so it's really cheery even on cloudy days.


Again, sorry about the mess. They redid the entire kitchen right before I moved in, so it's really nice. I have a gas range with two burners, a microwave from my previous place, a nice big sink, and more cabinets than I know what to do with. I don't currently have a fridge but...I'm working on that.

The window in the kitchen/living room area sadly looks out on nothing more than an alley, and it's so close to my neighbors that I can listen to their television shows in the evening.

If not for the piles of clothes it would almost be artistic.

I know it may be a bit early in our relationship, but I feel that it's time to invite you into my bedroom. I'd also like to introduce you to my #1 fan.

Okay, I'm sorry, those were two horrible jokes in a row. I promise I'll try to be serious from now on. This bedroom was what originally made me fall in love with this apartment. It's a nice size, bright white walls, and sunlight streaming in through the big window. It does face out onto the street so I'll need some curtains to shut out the light pollution of the local shops, but it's totally worth it for the feeling of waking up to bright sunshine. I can't decide if I want to get a real bed or a futon/mat type thing. This vast expanse of empty apartment feels so full of potential. I could put anything in here!

Always necessary.

I also have a bigger bathroom with a nicer mirror and better lighting. The red color scheme is nothing I would have chosen on my own, but it's growing on me, even if it clashes with the wall colors.

So far, I'm really happy with this space. I'm missing a lot of furniture still, so it feels a bit like camping, but I know I'll work that out over the next couple weeks. Sorry if this wasn't the most entertaining of posts, but I figure that maybe one or two people will be curious about my new digs.

Any tips on how I should arrange the living room and kitchen? I have no idea where to put the fridge.